so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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