the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He did a backflip because drugs
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