Grow some girl-balls and come out already
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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