you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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