there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize