Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday

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(973): View more from New Jersey

as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?

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(575): View more from New Mexico

I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.

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(734): View more from Michigan

I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.

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(815): View more from Illinois

When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.

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