And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
