i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize