i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
