In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
