can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
