and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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