This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
