That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
