No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
