I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
