Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
