i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
