I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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