I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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