The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
