I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
