There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
