Kiss
Puke
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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