yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
