These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
