funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize