if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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