he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
