Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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