her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
