Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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