The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
the day after is always just damage control
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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