I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
