I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
