Soap is not a condiment
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize