Why are handjobs necessary in class?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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