My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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