wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
