I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
