So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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