I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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