you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
