Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
