There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize