were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
