Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
