Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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