I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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