woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
