Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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