meet me or not, i'm out of control
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize